Raise your hand if you love food. Come on, don’t be shy. Food is many things. It can bring people together and make you feel better on a bad day. It can cure many ailments and the simple smell can make you feel “at home”. Well, Z is right there with you on all that. He absolutely loves to eat. He literally eats all day. If he isn’t hungry you know something is wrong.
Over the years, people have asked me if Z is on a special diet. There are all of these suggestions in the Autism world. Gluten free, dairy free, casein free, limit a bunch of colors (like red dye 36 or whatever). Once you start researching it can get a little crazy.
Well, to be honest, I haven’t tried going full-blown on any of these suggestions so I really can’t speak on them. However, I will say that we have become more conscious of what we are eating and what it contains since we’ve had Z. I find myself in the grocery aisles reading ingredients and going with options that contain the least amount of chemicals. I rarely buy frozen meals because I would rather make my own version from fresh ingredients.
We’ve been on a journey with food and Z. Oh what a journey, my friends! Let me take you down this path for a bit…
In the beginning, Z was extremely picky. He only had about 5 foods he would eat (breaded chicken nuggets, saltine crackers, goldfish, grapes, red sauce pasta). That’s it. If I attempted to give him anything else he would go into full meltdown mode, gag and sometimes force himself to throw up. I used to hold him down and push food into his cheeks only to find it hours later still somehow stuffed in those cheeks. He would not drink any water, only juice. If I watered down the juice, he would spit it out.
Our ABA group worked tirelessly on bringing in new foods to his diet. We would attempt an item (bread or banana for example). He would spend weeks allowing it on the plate, then simply poking it, then holding it, then kissing it, then licking it, then putting it in his mouth, then hopefully actually eating it. He would sit and scream and cry during each of these sessions. It would be months on a simple bite of bread and we would find in the end we barely made any progress. We ended up losing that ABA company (different post, different story…) and just sort of gave up in all honesty. At the time we had so many things we were working on and food was truly exhausting.
I know all kids are picky eaters and may throw a tantrum if they don’t get what they want. But Z will go into literal meltdown if he doesn’t get it. Put it this way… When we were trying to get approved for ABA hours in the beginning, they needed to see the level of his meltdown. They tried everything to make him mad and nothing worked. They finally asked me what had the greatest impact on him and I said “food”. So I showed him a granola bar (his fave) but refused to give it to him and you know what happened? He had a 10-minute full-blown meltdown and we were immediately approved the maximum hours.
We would go to restaurants but only to those that had breaded chicken nuggets (ever find a Japanese food place with these? good luck…). Do you know the looks I would get when we were eating breakfast but my kid was eating chicken nuggets and fries? Our lives revolved around what Z would eat or not eat. We would go to family gatherings and I always brought him his own meal.
But through all those years, we simply kept trying things. We had another ABA group that attempted feeding therapy but we didn’t make it a huge deal. I would put something random on his plate and be okay if it was still there at the end of the meal. We would try different restaurants and I would just make sure I had a backup plan packed up for him if he refused their food.
A couple years ago, he made a complete about-face. He started eating everything and was okay with trying anything new. We’re talking veggies (celery, broccoli, bell peppers), steak, grilled chicken. And he started drinking water all day. How did this happen? I have no idea. Sure, we worked at it, but I think it was taking the pressure off it and focusing on other areas that bought us the most progress. He gained skills and independence and was just finally ready on his own.
Now, unfortunately we have turned another corner. Now he loves food too much. It has become calming to him, something he runs to when stressed. He has eating patterns he has to follow, regardless if he is actually hungry. Our mornings start with cereal, then cheese and crackers, then chips, then granola bar, all rapid fire. If I try and give something else, he will go back to the pattern until he has completed it. When we go anywhere, I always have to pack a bunch of food. If we are out and about and I have run through my stash, I know it’s time to go home. I literally get anxiety when I’m out of food.
The first words Z initiated on his own were food. The first sentence Z put together was about food (“I want grapes.”) He will do pretty much any task if he is working towards some sort of food. So you can see how we are motivated to let him eat food all day. To keep him happy. Because on the other side is still that little boy melting down because he couldn’t have the granola bar. He simply does not understand why he can’t eat all day.
And of course nature plays against him in his quest as a foodie. He has major stomach problems. We are constantly managing constipation (which is mainly caused by the foods he loves (cheese, pasta). During these times, his diet is limited and we end up with a very grumpy boy who has not made the connection that what he loves the most is sometimes hurting his body.
And I suppose what this post highlights is the changing nature of Autism. Just when you think you are past something, it quickly is replaced with something else. It’s a balancing act. Does the benefit of how motivating food is outweigh these problems with over-eating? What are we gaining with this? Because the reality is that we are always changing our priority with what we are working towards. We are always celebrating progress in some area. And we will get there, we’ll eventually get back to it. But in the meantime, we are celebrating as any good foodie does..
Copyright 2019. All Rights Reserved.
Tilted Axis 